lessons of the laundromat

So.

Today I did some spring (or fall) cleaning. Lots of laundry, mostly. I just got back from taking all our oversized comforters and pillows, etc. to the Laundromat. As I was loading everything into dryers, a strange smelly man carrying a black leather jacket came up behind me.

"Excuse me, ma'am? Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," I said. He was dirty and didn't have any teeth. I'm going on a hunch and guessing this guy is homeless, or very near it.

"How would you like to buy this leather jacket for $5?"

I thought to my coat closet at home that is full of men's jackets and coats which haven't been touched in years. Then to my $2 in my back pocket that I was planning on using for the dryers. I didn't honestly have anything for the guy.

"I'm sorry, I don't have $5, and besides, I don't really need a men's leather coat." A dirty torn up men's leather coat. But that's not the point.

"I bought this coat for $100 and it's too heavy to carry around with me everywhere. Please? 5? 10 bucks?"
He bought it for $100 when he had money and just recently found it too heavy for his travels? Or he bought it recently for $100 not realizing it's large mass...

"I'm really sorry. I don't have any cash."

That is when he lost it. The garble was a bit too much to understand; he lost his enunciation when he started screaming, but I could pick out an, "Am I living in America?". I then strapped on my indifferent Findlay face, and proceed to ignore him. My daughter was with me and he was losing his mind in front of her. Besides, there is no logical political argument you can get into with an unstable homeless person.

I left; I had more errands to run, all of which I had planned on running after my laundry was finished, but I wanted to get Liv out of there, since he was, although outside, still there.

When I returned 20 minutes later, everyone was gone. Mr. LeatherJacket as well as the other woman that had been sitting there. I checked to see if my comforters were dry. They weren't. I grabbed the things that were dry out of the dryer, and realized that I was missing a couple things.

My daughter's princess comforter, and my son's Spiderman comforter were both gone. I was positive I had put them in the dryer, I had checked on a couple magic marker spots I was hoping to get out in the wash.

Now, the thief could have been the nice woman waiting on her laundry to dry- the woman who had offered Liv a nickel so she could afford a pack of gummy strawberries, or it could have been some random person who raids Laundromats in less than 20 minutes, or, more logically, it could have been my lone avenger, returning to claim something, anything from our meeting.

And let me say, damnit, if that stupid leather coat was too heavy to carry, what's he gonna do with two children's comforters? Maybe he found someone who would buy the coat, and figured he'd need something to keep him warm.

I actually had given it half a thought to give him the sleeping bag I had brought with me to wash. It weighs about 50 pounds, we don't use it for anything except for sleepovers, and I would have absolutely rejoiced to see it stolen. Same for a scraggly old comforter we just keep for snuggling up on cold nights watching the tube. TAKE THEM, PLEASE!

But I left the stupid things there. It's my own fault. I know better, and I know what happens. Plus, who calls the cops on a homeless guy stealing blankets? No, it's one I just gotta take for the team.

I may be the first person in Findlay (besides the dude that owned the leather coat) to be robbed by the homeless. Fair enough. But I will say, he better be using the damn things and not bartering them for crack.